Thursday, August 30, 2012

Overload Extreme

This semester is crazy. Crazy.

  • I am taking 17 credit hours, which is more than I have ever taken at one time.
  • I am in a position similar to that of an RA, but instead I'm working with residents on academic things. It's A LOT less stress and fewer hours, but it's still new and time-consuming.
  • I live in the freshman building to do that job. Talk about chaos.
  • I also started a second job, also new, in the tutoring center on campus. I work there 11 hours per week.
  • Now let's add one more thing. I am designing (EEP! :D) costumes for the first time this semester, which means a lot of research hours and a weekly production meeting, plus the physical act of pulling costumes and (heaven forbid) making them. 
I don't know our staff very well, but I've made a couple friends. One staff member lived on campus this summer as well, so we became pretty good friends, and I had my friend Nicole on campus too, which was good. But now that my best friends are back on campus, I really just want to spend time with them, but I can't. And Summer-friend feels like I have a grudge against being in Scanlon when two of my best friends were placed on V-Hall staff which, to be honest, I guess I do. Because I'm not actually an RA, I don't feel like I fit in with the others, but I'm still here, so I feel alone a lot. And it's only been three class days, but I'm already stressed and haven't seen my best friends, and I'm super terrified that I'm going to lose them, and I just want time with them. But they rarely text me, and I don't want to be that creepy needy friend. I keep hoping they'll text me occasionally too, but they don't. I don't know if it's just because they're as busy as I am or if they're just all together, so my absence isn't a huge deal... I miss them a lot. And I can't even vent about it in real life because it hurts Summer-friend's feelings (which I totally understand and don't want to do, because she is my friend). So instead I'm sitting in my room at 2:30 in the morning crying because I feel like I'm going to lose all of my non-freshman/non-math/non-theatre friends this semester, and it kills me. And it feels like it's already started. 

Sorry this is so whiny. I just don't know where to vent, and this seemed like the safest place to go because Nicole and Rachel are the only people who follow me, so it's not like anyone else will see it. Haha. 

Good night guys. 

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